My Darling Almighty God, I’m sitting here comfortably in the sunshine on our patio with a coffee and all I need to be peaceful … and I’m not. I have all the love, food, shelter, transport, abilities, dreams, achievements, friends, laughs, brains, good looks and opportunities and Son of God could ever ask for and I’m not happy. Why? I don’t need to tell you because you know all anyway, but I’m going to tell you anyway; probably for my benefit rather than yours.
It does feel a little trifling considering the wars, starvation, pollution, depression, rapes, muggings, murders, earthquakes, mudslides, volcanoes, meteorite near-misses and political correctness you’re probably grappling with on this beautifully fine Friday morning … and that’s only on planet Earth. I guess you get called to other planets, meteors and galaxies and, as I realise this, my wee problem has just got itself weeer.
However, despite the ginormity of your chosen tasks today (this morning) and the weeness of my problem, I know you’ll drop everything else and see to it, personally, that its sorted out immediately (in Earth-time, not Eternity-time) for I have the strangest notion – not based on any verifiable or objective measure but on a heck of a big hunch – that if my problem is sorted and I’m happy, my sortedness and happiness will spread through the world – nay, the galaxy – and help to bring sortedness and happiness to a HUGE number of sentient beings to whatever space I’m imagining I’m inhabiting at any given moment.
So, having cringed at your Almighty Feet in apoplectic apology for long enough, here goes my problem:
I was born (created?) with an inordinate number of talents, compared to the average humanoid. This, to the average humanoid, might not seem to be a problem … and it’s not, in itself.
To be totally clear about this, I’m not asking to have any talents erased from my data base of attributes. None at all!
The problem, as I’m creating it, is that I want to use all the talents, whose use brings me joy. Yet I just don’t seem to be using any of them and I’m feeling frustrated by my lack of continuing interest in anything and in my current state of inertia.
You see (however a darling Almighty God sees), I get really interested in one thing and I get all hot and heavy with it for a while and then the fever subsides and another project or idea takes my fancy, blows my remaining hair back and I’m all hot and heavy over that for a day, a week, a month – some short time – and then that fades too as yet another plan takes my eye and my heart.
I want to write successfully.
I want to teach successfully.
I want to travel extensively.
I want to use my extensive business skills successfully.
I want to write and perform music.
I want to make a positive difference.
I want to work with people, increasing the inspiration, happiness and sortedness on the planet.
I want to have fun and spread fun.
I want to have peace and spread peace.
Now, my little brain just cannot imagine how I can do all of those things at once or consecutively in any reasonable pattern. This just does not compute on my computer’s hardware ad I don’t know if the conundrum has actioned a short circuit or some nonsensical algorithm absurdity but all I know is that I don’t know … I don’t know what to do right now. I don’t know what to do (or aspire to) for the foreseeable future and I don’t know how or where to find a continuing passion/interest in any one particular thing.
And yet, somewhere in my heart, there lies (probably asleep or unconscious) a knowing that I can have all I want – to write, teach, travel, play, love, inspire, sort and uplift – and that it’s possible to do all of those things in some neatly logical blend of sequences … and that I’ll find that blend/sequence and my interest and success in it/them will grow.
So, oh Great and Patient Magnificence, what’s your answer?
Considering you’re put down your pen, laptop and mobile phone to listen, with personal intensity, to this sincere entreaty, I’d suggest that, in the name of efficiency, you may as well solve this wee dilemma while you’re on the case and listening. Then – since you know of my commitment to help you out any and all of the time – I can put my galactic muscle to the grindstone and help you with all those large catastrophes and injustices.
Thanks for listening and I appreciate your immediate and clear answer.
Your obedient servant.